Winter was coming. It had come five times before and the same thought had crossed my mind but without action. I’d gotten really good at surviving the burst of hormonal urges during Spring and Summer was a no-brainer. I wasn’t used to walking around half naked and didn’t like to be hugged or touched during hot weather. Fall was my season of reflection and freedom. It was winter when I thought of being cold, of comfort, when I got needy. The end of 2011 was the fifth time I'd had to fight those feelings head on and , this time, I decided to do something about it.
I would get at least three boyfriends for the winter. Someone to take me out to eat, give me a hug, a kiss and squeeze me a bit during the movies. That was my objective. No sex. No relationship. No complications.
I knew I wasn’t built for long term love – I had relationship ADD. I could fall madly in lust with a person, but I became bored easily and the “relationship” didn’t last long. That had been my record until my marriage. Now I was older, starting from literally square one and not in the least interested in getting into a long term, marriage ending situation with a total stranger. So, since I mostly longed for companionship on an semi-intimate level in the winter, I would get 3 boyfriends for the winter only. Men didn’t care for long term commitments either so I figured it couldn’t be that hard if I explained my objective up front.
I knew I wasn’t built for long term love – I had relationship ADD. I could fall madly in lust with a person, but I became bored easily and the “relationship” didn’t last long. That had been my record until my marriage. Now I was older, starting from literally square one and not in the least interested in getting into a long term, marriage ending situation with a total stranger. So, since I mostly longed for companionship on an semi-intimate level in the winter, I would get 3 boyfriends for the winter only. Men didn’t care for long term commitments either so I figured it couldn’t be that hard if I explained my objective up front.
My BGF (best guy friend) was sure I wouldn’t be able to pull it off without sex on the table, which I was adamantly against. I thought I could, if I explained my objective clearly and without deception. It worked twice (well, technically 3 times) and I failed at it twice.
This is my story of how I did it, how it turned out, and what I learned. I figure I went from 0 - 60 in 3 months and I KNOW there are a lot of normal women out there who don't believe or want to be the real life version of Sex in the City so they can too. I wish I had done it sooner. And I'm grateful to the people around me that gave me ideas and support to change my life a little for the winter...
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Please don't be mean but be candid. These are just my experiences - feel free to share (Oh wait, that sounds very support group-ish, ugh!)